Loud phone noises. Similar-looking guys in similar blue shirts and ties are working under similar grey lamps. It all looks so manufactured, even the people. It's scary, really, because this is how real offices really look.
Oliver and the anonymous male Swinnie are having a game of darts in the break room. That strikes me as a rather dangerous sport to be playing indoors. If someone were to just walk in, you'd easily throw the darts at them. The camera is outside the break room, and suddenly David walks in and takes a pose in front of the camera, with his thumb up and everything. He says, "You can't beat a bit of bully!" in a mock voice that's supposed to imitate something, but I either don't know the reference or he's doing such a bad impression (probably both) that I don't get it. "Bullseye," he clarifies in his normal voice and laughs. What makes me laugh is his leather jacket. It really draws attention to his gut, which is probably the opposite of what he was trying to achieve. "Here they are, lovely lads," he says to the camera and/or the guys. Now they're lovely? Last week they were "boring" and "slugs" that "have no personality". "New shoes," observes the anonymous male (AM). "Fashion," says David and turns to the camera for a quick look and shrug. Yes, he's really keeping up with the latest fashions. Before I go shopping, I always check what David Brent is wearing. AM asks David if he wants to throw the dart, and of course he does. I think AM just wants to see how badly he'll do so they can laugh at him when they leave the room. In an effort to make them laugh at him while he's still in the room, David offers some lame quotes from movies or whatever that I don't recognize. "Let Tony look after you" and "Nothing in this game, just two in the bed". I can't find them on Google and I'm not going to look further - suffice to say that he's laughing at his own jokes, but boring the other two guys, as usual.
He throws the dart, and even if the dart board is not on camera, you can tell he missed because there's the sound of a dart hitting the wall and then the floor. David blames it on the game, of course; he asks if throwing darts isn't "a bit fuddy-duddy" for "a couple of young lads". AM protests that he's 29, so he's not young. "Ooo, over the hill," says David jokingly. He has his hands on his hips and you can really see how small the jacket is on him. Aww, poor David. always so misguided in his attempts to be cool. He enters dangerous territory as he asks AM how old he looks. "Umm...40?" offers AM. That's interesting, because people usually say a lower number than the one they're thinking of. So AM probably thinks David looks older than 40. I bet he was thinking 45. "No, how old do you think I look? Not..." David says. Wow, he's really desperate. "39?" offers AM. One year lower? Ouch! "Most people say I look about 30," David says, bringing in his beloved "people" who are always there to compliment him, no matter what any idiots who actually exist might say. "Definitely not," says AM, and at this point, I'm beginning to think he's really stupid. Or just really really honest, which isn't a good thing when you work for David. "Are you calling them liars?!" David exclaims, obviously offended. He'll stick up for his imaginary friends! No one gets to question their judgements! "What do you think?" David asks Oliver, who is more wise than AM: "Between... 30 and 40?" Diplomatic, and means that he probably also thinks 39. "Yes!" David says. "More honest." Ah, I see, David takes "honest" to mean "telling me what I want to hear". He walks out of the room shaking his head, and the guys look after him, rolling their eyes a bit. Yeah, that's your boss, guys. Get used to it. And be honest, he likes that.
Warehouse. Some guy is operating a forklift, but it doesn't look like Anton. Too bad, he sounds so interesting. Tim stops at the warehouse door and tells the Swinnies that they're "about to enter a warehouse environment. I must warn you that some people here are working class, so there may be arse cleavage." Trudy cheers at this. She annoys me. Tim continues: "Just find a partner and hold hands. Don't talk to anyone though." The Swinnies laugh. Tim turns to Brenda and asks if she's cheating - I think. I can't really tell with his accent at that point. You know, English subtitles would really help me here, but alas, I've got a European version that doesn't have them for some reason. Anyway, I like that he treats Brenda like everybody else, not like "OMG wheelchair charity case". They walk into the warehouse, and Malcolm and another baboon stare wistfully after Trudy and Rachel. Why are the warehouse guys all such Neanderthals? More forklifting - it makes such an annoying noise, much like the dvd menus - and Tim leads them to "the heart of the operation", where everybody's having a break. Dawn is sitting next to Lee and the girls say hi to her. She's wearing a pretty blue shirt, and I suspect she's trying to compete with Rachel, because Rachel had a similar blue shirt on the week before. Because there are women in the group, Glynn has to comment: "Strippers have arrived!" Ugh. I don't think I'd last very long at the warehouse without punching one or more of the guys. "Tell you what, I'll give you five minutes, but no touching," says Tim and mimicks taking off his jacket. "Always knew you were bent," says Glynn as if Tim is serious. Disgustingly, Lee points at Dawn's breasts and says, "Don't worry. She'll take the old milkers out for a tenner." "Fuck off!" says Dawn, shocked. The guys laugh. Why are they together? This guy has zero respect for her. Dawn walks away and Lee looks a bit surprised. "Oy, lend us a tenner," says one of the guys. "You won't be seeing those tonight," says another. "That's alright, I've got cable," says Lee. Tim is staring in disbelief at this display of disrespect - is that the most dises ever in a sentence? - and decides it's time for his group to move on. "Bender!" one of the guys calls out after him and they chuckle. Yeah, hilarious.
Back at the office, the number bods are working boringly, and Trudy is making a personal call. Her screensaver reads "happy birthday". She's being pretty loud and annoying. "No! Get lost you cheeky bastard!" she shouts and laughs and snorts. I hate it when people make really loud personal calls at work. Well, it's even worse if they're fighting on the phone. There's this guy who constantly calls his family, and it's disturbing to hear him hiss, "Don't hang up on me like that! -I know, but you don't have to hang up! -Stop telling me what to do! What's that supposed to mean!" You know, dish it out at home. Laughing in an annoying way is disturbing too though.
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9 comments:
I think Tim jokingly asks the disabled lady "Are you chewing?", but I'm not too sure either.
Still, your understanding of the various british accents is remarkable.
It is 'are you chewing?' It is a reference to chewing gum. Tim is saying that as if it is a school trip and he is the teacher.
The 'bully' reference is to a darts-themed game show in the UK called Bullseye presented by Jim Bowen, whose catchphrase was "you can't beat a bit of bully".
He actually says: "here they are, the likely lads" Look up the reference. That scene is another work of art!
I don't actually know where to start with this. Probably the worst review of anything ever. Clearly have no grasp of British humour. I understand some of the references might go over your head, but if you're going to write such an elaborate article about a subject, at least revise it first. You've made a whole point out of him saying 'lovely lads' which isn't correct. He actually says likely lads which is British banter for people who you would usually find doing said activity. Also the point you made about him not wanting to draw attention to his gut? You do realise that this is a mockumentary and the exact purpose of the whole show is to highlight the office culture in the UK, and how overweight, arrogant bosses are rife in the workplace trying so hard to get everyone to like them whilst still thinking they're young and that they are still appealing. So in reference to your remark I believe that he was absolutely trying to draw attention to his ageing rounded physique. I suggest that you watch a few more easy going British comedies to gauge our sort of humour, before you rip apart one of the finest most subtly sophisticated works of British television without any knowledge of the programmes purpose. 0/10
Something about Brent not believing it when someone says something he doesn’t like, and praising those who compliment him remind me so much of Donald Trump
Absolutely horrible review. Most of the points I was about to raise have been mentioned in previous comments.
But the so called "Anonymous Male" is Neil Godwin, David Brent's BOSS!
"You can't beat a bit of bully!", "Up to the oche, let Tony look after you" and "Nothing in this game for two in the bed" are all references to the British game show Bullseye which was a show based on darts. The fact he continually churns out Bullseye catchphrases shows his knowledge of darts only stretches to Bullseye and not to the competitive game.
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