Deleted scene 6: Gareth Makes Small Talk
This is actually a fairly redundant scene, especially compared to the comedy gold of the earlier ones. We see Gareth chatting with Emma and Young Male Employee, who look very bored, especially Emma who does the stealthy "looking into another direction because I'm just trying to stay awake" thing. Gareth is apparently talking about his car, tin-eared as always to the people around him. He talks in a voice that suggests it's very impressive that he fixed it up all by himself. He makes eye contact while saying that and then looks down while saying, "Well, my uncle helped me a bit, but..." It's this perfect little boy act. I love Mackenzie Crook. While Emma looks away, YME asks Gareth how long he's had it. "Bout eighteen months now. And you know how much it's gone up in price since I got it?" YME makes this "don't ask me" noise, because really he couldn't care less. "About two grand," Gareth says proudly. "Two grand?" repeats YME because he has to. Gareth looks at Emma, so she feels compelled to say: "Are you gonna sell it?" Gareth says he might, and when he does, he'll get a Porsche. Hee. He could really get a Porsche with a car he fixed him up by himself? YME and Emma act impressed, but are probably calling bullshit in their minds. It's a good scene for dissecting Gareth's delusions, but I think the "I could beat you at this card game" act was a much better example. So no wonder they cut this one.
Deleted scene 7: David's Power
On Neil's first day, David's introducing "the old office" to him, still so cocky and sure of himself, unaware of what's to come. He tells Neil, "The good side of having the office here is that I can see everyone." Can he really? I mean, his desk isn't even that close to the window, and the Number Bods in particular are fairly far from his room. For some reason, David starts explaining: "That's not because I'm spying on them, they're spying on me, seeing if I'm in there having a laugh.. WITH THEM." Hee. I love how David's mind always goes directly into how people could misinterpret the things he's saying, so he keeps correcting his own metaphors and making them mean the exact opposite. If he's having a laugh with them, wouldn't they be there? David continues, "But they still know I'm hte boss. When I say jump, they jump." Eager to show his power to Neil, he tells Emma, who's copying something, to go get him some coffee. "Get it yourself," says Emma and walks by without even looking at David. Maybe he shouldn't have tested his power on a female employee by asking for coffee. It might sound a little bit sexist, but of course David wouldn't know sexism unless someone actually uttered the words "Men are superior to women". "Yeah, joking," David says to Neil. He looks at his watch: "She actually knows I wouldn't.. want one now." He chuckles a bit at the camera, then awkwardly moves onto "Sit down" and walks into the room, turning away from the camera to hide his embarrassment. Gotta love David, even if it's not the best scene.
Deleted Scene 8: Hot Lesbian Action
Continued from a scene that I'm not too fond of, Rachel is asking Dawn if there's something between her and Tim, "cos you two get on so well together." "I get on with everyone," says Dawn uneasily. She's not really even looking at Rachel. Rachel asks her to ask Tim if he likes her. Dawn asks if she should slip him a note: "If you like Rachel, check this box..." Rachel seems to have a sense of humor about it, and it's actually a pretty natural moment between them, which I like. Too bad it wasn't in the episode. But the best part follows as Gareth walks in. "Ladies," he says, and then adds, "Rachel." So I guess Rachel isn't one of the ladies? "Having a chat? Ladies talk. Don't mind me," Gareth says condescendingly. I think he's just trying to be friendly, but since he thinks women are kinda frivolous and good only for sex, everything he tells them becomes superior and annoying. He might as well be saying, "Sorry, am I interrupting your little chat about boys and makeup?"
Dawn and Rachel react to this in the best possible way. As Gareth bites into a peach, Dawn starts carefully, "So, what do you think about it, because I have seriously considered lesbianism." Rachel, who's immediately in on it, says, "Great, so have I!" The camera zooms in on Gareth who looks very uncomfortable all of a sudden. As the girls pretend to plan a sex meeting, you can see Gareth looking shifty as if he's peeping on them. Rachel suggests they go into a hotel, "just in case I get a bit carried away, cos I am likely to go pretty berserk." Gareth actually makes a noise, he's so uncomfortable. He shifts his position a bit on the chair. "I need a... spoon," he mutters, planning an obvious escape. Dawn asks, "Gareth, what are you doing tonight?" "I'm busy," says Gareth quickly and walks away with his back hunched, as if he's sporting a huge boner. "It's as easy as that," says Dawn as soon as Gareth leaves. "Oh my god," says Rachel and laughs. This was a great, hilarious scene. I wonder if they cut it only because it's so risqué. Maybe BBC didn't want to show lesbian references and women cock-teasing men. I loved it. And not just because I'm a lesbian. It's probably the only non-Tim-related funny moment between Dawn and Rachel, where they actually work together instead of being rivals. I think there aren't enough moments like that on The Office.
Deleted Scene 9:
Gareth walks into David's office and asks if he's leaving then. "Moving on," David corrects. "Time for celebration, not time for tears! I don't want you getting upset." As he's not even looking at Gareth, it seems more likely that he's talking to the camera and showing off how much his employees love him. It's an understandable thought considering Gareth's reaction to him leaving in season 1. However, this time Gareth was thinking of something else: "I'm worried if Tim gets your job, that would be unfair, cos I've been here a lot longer than him." It's interesting that Gareth seems to realize he's not regarded as highly by Jennifer and Neil as Tim is. David gets offended that Gareth only cares about the job: "I'm leaving, you're not upset about that." Gareth says he is. "Good! You should be!" says David and looks at the camera like, "Can you believe this ingratitude?" even if he just said he doesn't want him upset. I guess it's one of those subtle differences, like he doesn't want people to thank him, he just wants them to think they should thank him. Or Gareth's "don't think of me as your boss, but know that I am."
Gareth reassures David that he really cares, but then he looks out of the office at Tim and David notices that. "You're still thinking about getting the job, aren't you?" says David angrily. "If I'm being honest, yeah," says Gareth. I love this little exchange between them:
David: "I can't believe it!" *looks at the camera*
Gareth: "Well, it's in my head, I can't get it out."
David: "Get it out! -Please. Because... Of all the people, you're the mercenary. You're the one that... I'm disappointed."
Gareth: "At least I'm honest. One of the things you taught me in business is 'strike while the iron is hot.' So... you know."
David: "Did I teach you that?"
Gareth: "Yeah."
David: "What else?"
Gareth: "Lots of stuff."
David: "Lots of stuff. What, specifically?" *looks at the camera with a smug grin. Then looks at Gareth. Then, as Gareth is taking his time, David turns to the camera with the smug grin again.*
David: "You're thinking of getting the job again, aren't you?"
Gareth: "I just think I'd have to swap stuff around. I'm left-handed, so..."
David: "Don't wanna hear it! Do I!" *turns to the camera to signal indignation to viewers*
David *looks at Gareth angrily*
Gareth *awkward silence; looks away*
I love this scene. It just shows so well what they're like and what their relationship really is. Gareth is a suck-up, not a true friend; he's hardly an apprentice like David seems to think he is. Gareth is the kind of guy who will take advantage of whoever has the power; by sucking up, he can gain more power, and he's probably been waiting for this chance all through his career. David, on the other hand, is just as selfish. He sold out his staff in the first season, only to return because he had to; now he's leaving, not to move on, but because he's not a good boss, and he doesn't seem genuinely saddened to leave any of them, because he doesn't have any kind of relationship with his staff outside of "look how brilliant and amusing I am". Maybe he took Gareth's sucking up to be friendship, just like he takes Finchy's mean jokes to be friendship. He's dumb enough to surround himself with "friends" like this, and it results in his utter loneliness in the Christmas specials. I think for David, the pegging order is Finchy-David-Gareth, and he's offended to see Gareth change places with him. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Great scene anyway.
Deleted Scene 10: Gareth Cares
Dawn and Tim are giggling at the copy machine. "We're very excited," Dawn tells the camera, "because we've just found an invention from the mind of Gareth Keenan. 'How to Get Disabled People Out of a Building in Case of a Fire.' He's drawn one of those shutes that work when you dump rubbish in the skip." Tim laughs so hard he has to lean on the copier. Dawn reads on: "Note: Make sure there is a normal person waiting to stop them flying off the other end!" Her eyes go really round at "normal person", and Tim does his wide-eyed shocked expression. "Normal," he repeats and laughs. "Here's my favorite bit," says Dawn and reads: "Wheelchair to be picked later by the fireman, in case it's hot." Tim is so amused by this, he does a little dance and half-whispers, "In case it's hot!" They conclude that he really gave it some thought. Gareth's drawing, by the way, looks just like he's spending half his time making drawings of tanks and bombs and armies attacking each other. Which he probably is. Awesome scene. It's not even very long, so I don't see a reason to cut it. It shows us a nice, natural friendship moment between Dawn and Tim to balance out all the awkward moments.
Deleted Scene 11: Gareth's Dilemma
Gareth walks into David's office and apologizes for being insensitive earlier. David seems fine with it, even if he seemed furious earlier. Gareth picks his ear as David says, "Human nature I'm afraid." I wonder if he had time to think things thru and realized that if he can sell out his staff, maybe Gareth can focus on the idea of getting his job. Gareth decides to hug David, and David is very careful to keep his arms on his side to show he is not returning this hug. He even explains to the camera: "It's just two guys being sorry through physicality, it's not ... you know." Gay? I love how David's biggest concern is that someone will think he's gay. It says a lot about his idea of gays and masculinity. While still hugging David, Gareth asks who's going to get the job. "Get off me!" David says angrily and pushes him off. "Sorry," says Gareth. Hee. David gets indignant again and straightens his tie several times, like he does when he's upset. "I've got a lot on my mind, women troubles," says Gareth. "Well, go home if you're not well," David says. Hee! He actually thought men can have women's troubles? Does he know what they actually are? I guess not. Hilarious.
Gareth explains his problem: "I've got two birds on the go at the same time." David is immediately interested and acts like he thinks much more of Gareth because of it. Which he, sadly, probably does. "No one here, is it?" he asks. "No," says Gareth, and the way he says it implies that he thinks everyone at the office is undoable. Even if he was trying to hit on Rachel. Gareth explains that one of the girls is "an absolute stunner." David looks at the camera, smiling knowingly, and asks Gareth to define that. "Well, he looks like Nelly Furtado, so..." David makes an accepting smile and nod at the camera. "One of them is a bit..." and Gareth puffs up his cheeks. "Great tits tho." Because the camera is there, David exclaims, "Gareth! Sexist!" Gareth corrects: "Well, nice knockers." Yes, because it was the word that was sexist, not the idea of comparing two women only based on their looks or implying that the fatter one is somehow inferior and only has good breasts to make up for it. It's so telling that Gareth thinks you can just replace a word and make it less sexist.
"NICE BREASTS!" David almost shouts, and has to say to a woman off-camera: "No, not yours, I..." Judging by the look on his face, she walked away angrily. "Better than hers," says Gareth, leaning over to look at her. "It's not a competition, Gareth!" David exclaims in a fake voice and looks at the camera. He really thinks he's superior and less sexist than Gareth; he realizes you shouldn't talk about women's breasts. His look at the camera is a little too long, and then he turns to Gareth who looks down, embarrassed. Awww, poor stupid Gareth. He means well, he just doesn't respect women at all. And nor does David. I'm loving it.
OK, so the Christmas specials next! I'm not going to say when, because it always seems like it takes longer than I promise, but coming soon.
Thursday, August 2, 2007
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